CHAPTER 10 The Cost of Discipleship

In previous chapters we have touched on Jesus’ call to discipleship. Here we will examine it more closely. Let me say again unequivocally that Jesus’ summons to deny self and follow Him was an invitation to salvation, not an offer of a “higher life” or a second step of faith following salvation. The contemporary teaching that separates discipleship from salvation springs from ideas that are foreign to Scripture.

Every Christian is a disciple. In fact, the Lord’s Great Commission was to go into all the world and “make disciples… teaching them to observe all that I commanded you” (Matt. 28:19-20). That means the mission of the church, and the goal of evangelism, is to make disciples. Disciples are people who believe, those whose faith motivates them to obey all Jesus commanded. The word disciple is used consistently as a synonym for believer throughout the book of Acts (6:1, 2, 7; 11:26; 14:20, 22; 15:10). Any distinction between the two words is purely artificial. Though introduced by sincere and well-meaning men, it has given birth to a theology of superficial faith that disposes of the hard demands of Jesus.

When Jesus called disciples, He carefully instructed them about the cost of following Him. Half-hearted people who were not willing to make the commitment did not respond. Thus He turned away anyone who was reluctant to pay the price-such as the rich young ruler. He warned all who thought of becoming disciples to count the cost carefully. “Which one of you, when he wants to build a tower, does not first sit down and calculate the cost to see if he has enough to complete it? Otherwise, when he has laid a foundation and is not able to finish, all who observe it begin to ridicule him, saying, ‘This man began to build and was not able to finish’” (Luke 14:28-30).

A Christian is not one who simply buys “fire insurance,” who “accepts Christ” just to escape hell. As we have seen repeatedly, true believers’ faith expresses itself in submission and obedience. Christians follow Christ. They are committed unquestionably to Christ as Lord and Savior. They desire to please God. They are humble, meek learners. When they fail, they seek forgiveness and move forward. That is their spirit and their direction.

The call to Christian discipleship explicitly demands just that kind of total dedication. It is full commitment, with nothing knowingly or deliberately held back. No one can come to Christ on any other terms. Those who think they can simply affirm a list of gospel facts and continue to live any way they please should examine themselves to see if they are really in the faith (2 Cor. 13:5).

In Matthew 10:32-39, Jesus challenged His disciples, saying:

Everyone who confesses Me before men, I will also confess him before My Father who is in heaven. But whoever denies Me before men, I will also deny him before My Father who is in heaven…. He who loves father or mother more than Me is not worthy of Me; and he who loves son or daughter more than Me is not worthy of Me. And he who does not take his cross and follow after Me is not worthy of Me. He who has found his life will lose it, and he who has lost his life for My sake will find it.

Our Lord gave no more definitive statement on discipleship than that. He spells out in the clearest possible language the cost of discipleship. The words are addressed to the Twelve in particular, but they are principles of discipleship applicable to us all. Matthew 10:24 says, “A disciple is not above his teacher.” A disciple here means any disciple, and the words that follow, to the end of the chapter, apply to discipleship in general.

Those who see disciples as a separate class of more dedicated believers will point out that the Twelve—or at least eleven of them—were already believers in Christ and thus did not need instruction on what it means to come to Christ with saving faith. It is true that most of the disciples were undoubtedly already born again, but that does not negate the impact of these words for them. The fact is, these men were already called disciples, too (Matt. 10:1). This was not an invitation to a higher kind of relationship, but a reminder of what had already been established when they believed. Our Lord was continuing to teach them the meaning of faith and salvation, and constantly reminding them of the commitment they had made when they chose to follow Him.

These words apply to you and me as well. Luke 14:25-35 contains similar words-in even stronger language—which Jesus spoke not just to the Twelve, but to the multitudes who came to hear Him. Matthew 10:2 refers to the Twelve as “apostles.” That means “sent ones.” Their basic training being complete, Jesus sent them out to preach. In this parting charge to them, however, He uses the word disciple, not apostle. His words apply to every disciple, serving as a signpost to every potential follower of Jesus.

Confessing Christ before Others

Verses 32-33 in Matthew 10 are reminiscent of the awesome judgment scene in Matthew 7:21-23: “Everyone who confesses Me before men, I will also confess him before My Father who is in heaven. But whoever denies Me before men, I will also deny him before My Father who is in heaven.” Does that mean confession before others is a condition of becoming a true Christian? No, but it means that a characteristic of every genuine believer is that he or she will profess faith in Christ unreservedly. Paul wrote, “I am not ashamed of the gospel, for it is the power of God for salvation” (Rom. 1:16).

The heart of real discipleship is a commitment to be like Jesus Christ. That means both acting as He did and being willing to accept the same treatment. It means facing a world that is hostile to Him and doing it fearlessly. It means confessing before others that Jesus is Lord and being confident that He will also speak on our behalf before the Father.

“Confess” means to affirm, to acknowledge, to agree. It is a statement of identification, faith, confidence, and trust. One can confess Christ with the mouth, as Romans 10:9 says, and also confess Him through righteous behavior, as Titus 1:16 implies. We are to confess Christ “before men.” This emphasizes the public character of the confession, and its meaning cannot be avoided. In Romans 10:10 we read, “With the heart a person believes, resulting in righteousness, and with the mouth he confesses, resulting in salvation.” If the heart truly believes, the mouth will be eager to confess. Confession is not merely a human work; it is prompted and energized by God, subsequent to the act of believing but inseparable from it. Again, confession is a characteristic of true faith; it is not an additional condition of salvation.

First John 4:15 says, “Whoever confesses that Jesus is the Son of God, God abides in him, and he in God.” What is the mark of a true Christian? He confesses Jesus as the Son of God.

This does not mean a disciple will stand up for the Lord on every occasion. Peter denied the Lord three times on the night He was betrayed. Then there was Timothy, perhaps the finest of Paul’s disciples, pastor of the church at Ephesus. This dedicated young man with such marvelous pastoral gifts was a model disciple. But he may have experienced a temporary spiritual malfunction, or perhaps he was susceptible to fear. Paul had to write to him, “Do not be ashamed of the testimony of our Lord” (2 Tim. 1:8).

A moment of failure does not invalidate a disciple’s credentials. We have all failed to confess Christ before others more often than we would like to admit. But if we are true disciples, we will not purposely and in a calculated way keep our faith hidden from everyone all the time. Even Joseph of Arimathea, whom the apostle John called a “secret disciple,” had the boldness to go to Governor Pilate after the crucifixion and ask for the body of Jesus (John 19:38).

Christ says He will confess us before the Father in heaven (Matt. 10:32). What does that mean? Christ will say on the day of judgment, “This one belongs to Me.” He will affirm His loyalty to those who have affirmed their loyalty to Him. The other side of it is also stated: “But whoever denies Me before men, I will also deny him before My Father who is in heaven” (v. 33). This does not speak primarily of open rejecters—people who would deny Christ flagrantly, have nothing to do with Him, despise Him, speak against Him, or blaspheme His name. The truth certainly applies to people like that, but our Lord is talking specifically about false disciples, people who claim to be Christians but are not.

When put to the test, they consistently deny the Lord, either by their silence, by their actions, or by their words. In fact, the idea here encompasses all those things. It speaks of someone whose entire life is a denial of Christ. He may claim to believe, but everything about his way of living exudes denial (cf. Titus 1:16). Churches are filled with such people, masquerading as disciples but routinely denying the Lord in some very disturbing ways. Christ will deny them before God (Matt. 10:33).

Matthew 25:31-46 details what will happen in the judgment. Specifically, this passage describes the separation of the sheep and goats at the end of the Tribulation, at the judgment of the nations (v. 32). But its principle applies to individuals in every phase of God’s judgment. Here the Lord puts the sheep (those who have confessed Him) on His right hand, and the goats (those who have denied Him) on His left (v. 33), and ushers the sheep into the kingdom. These are the righteous people who have confessed Him. How do we know? He says, “I was hungry, and you gave Me something to eat; I was thirsty, and you gave Me something to drink; I was a stranger, and you invited Me in; naked, and you clothed Me; I was sick, and you visited Me; I was in prison, and you came to Me” (vv. 35–36). Once again, we see that the pattern of their lives reveals the reality of their claim to know Christ. Those who fail to live in a way that is consistent with faith in Christ are sent to eternal punishment (v. 46).

Getting the Priorities Straight

A second hallmark of a true disciple is loving Christ even more than one’s own family (Matt. 10:35–37). Verse 37 in particular is very strong: “He who loves father or mother more than Me is not worthy of Me; and he who loves son or daughter more than Me is not worthy of Me.”

If you think that is forceful, look at the parallel passage in Luke 14:26-27: “If anyone comes to Me, and does not hate his own father and mother and wife and children and brothers and sisters, yes, and even his own life, he cannot be My disciple.”

To be a disciple, must we literally hate our families? Obviously this does not call for hatred in any sense that would violate the clear commandments of God, such as, “Honor your father and your mother” (Ex. 20:12), and, “Husbands, love your wives” (Eph. 5:25). The key to this passage is the phrase “yes, and even his own life” (Luke 14:26). The Lord is saying we must be unquestioningly loyal to Him, even above our families—and especially above ourselves. Scripture teaches we are to deny self (Matt. 16:24), consider ourselves dead (Rom. 6:11), lay the old self aside (Eph. 4:22)—to treat the selfish aspect of our beings with the utmost contempt (cf. 1 Cor. 9:27). That is the same attitude we are to have toward our earthly possessions and even toward our families.

Why is this language so severe? Why does Christ use such offensive terms? Because He is as eager to drive the uncommitted away as He is to draw true disciples to Himself. He does not want halfhearted people to be deceived into thinking they are in the kingdom. Unless He is honored as Lord, He has not been given His rightful place.

Taking Up the Cross

Those who are not willing to lose their lives for Christ are not worthy of Him (Matt. 10:38). They cannot be His disciples (Luke 14:27). These statements cannot be made to accommodate the casual approach to conversion that is in vogue in our generation. Jesus is not asking people to add Him to the milieu of their lives. He wants disciples willing to forsake everything. This calls for full-scale self-denial-even willingness to die for His sake if necessary.

When Matthew 10:38 says, “He who does not take his cross and follow after Me is not worthy of Me,” it does not mean bearing the “cross” of a difficult situation, a chronic disease, or a nagging spouse. I have heard devotional sermons spiritualizing the cross to mean everything from a cranky mother-in-law to a leaky roof to a 1957 Chevy! But that is not what the word cross meant to Jesus’ first-century audience. It did not call to their minds the idea of long-term difficulties or troublesome burdens. It did not even evoke thoughts of Calvary the Lord had not gone to the cross yet, and they did not understand that He would.

When Jesus said “take up your cross” to them, they thought of a cruel instrument of torture and death. They thought of dying in the most agonizing method known to man. They thought of poor, condemned criminals hanging on crosses by the roadside. Doubtless they had seen men executed in that fashion.

Jesus’ listeners understood that He was calling them to die for Him. They knew He was asking them to make the ultimate sacrifice, to surrender to Him as Lord in every sense.

The Lord adds a final paradoxical thought on the meaning of discipleship: “He who has found his life will lose it, and he who has lost his life for My sake will find it” (Matt. 10:39). “He who has found his life” seems to refer to a person who has guarded his physical safety by denying Christ under pressure, or someone who clings to his life rather than taking up the cross. Because his first concern is securing his physical life, that person loses his eternal soul. Conversely, those who are willing to forfeit their lives for Christ’s sake will receive eternal life.

The Bible does not teach salvation by martyrdom. The Lord was not advising the disciples to try to get themselves killed for Him. Again He was referring to a pattern, a direction. He was simply saying that genuine Christians do not shrink back, even in the face of death. To express it another way, when confronted with a decision between serving self and serving the Lord, the true disciple is the one who chooses to serve the Lord, even at great personal expense.

Again, this is not absolute in the sense that it disallows temporary failures like that of Peter. But even Peter did ultimately prove himself to be a true disciple, didn’t he? The time came when he willingly gave His life for Jesus’ sake.

Luke 9:23 records similar words of Jesus: “If anyone wishes to come after Me, he must deny himself, and take up his cross daily and follow Me.” Notice the addition of the one word: “daily.” The life of a disciple invites persecution and therefore must be a life of daily self-denial. Paul wrote to the Corinthians, “I affirm, brethren, by the boasting in you which I have in Christ Jesus our Lord, I die daily” (1 Cor. 15:31).

The idea of daily self-denial does not jibe with the contemporary supposition that believing in Jesus is a momentary decision. A true believer is one who signs up for life. The bumper sticker sentiment “Try Jesus” is a mentality foreign to real discipleship-faith is not an experiment, but a lifelong commitment. It means taking up the cross daily, giving all for Christ each day. It means no reservations, no uncertainty, no hesitation (Luke 9:59–61). It means nothing is knowingly held back, nothing purposely shielded from His lordship, nothing stubbornly kept from His control. It calls for a painful severing of ties with the world, a sealing of escape hatches, a ridding oneself of any kind of security to fall back on in case of failure. Genuine believers know they are going ahead with Christ until death. Having put their hand to the plow, they will not look back (v. 62).

That is how it must be for all who would follow Jesus Christ. It is the stuff of true discipleship.